Ed. note: My friend, ahh, “Rasputin Jones,” is a very talented comedy writer with a bad pseudonym. “Rasputin” sent me the following messages over the course of one night; I thought I’d post them here for public consumption. Because that’s what happens when talented comedy writers send Ruined Music haiku to my personal email address at 4 a.m. Yes, there will be a site update with real stories in a few days - just think of this as an hors d’oeuvre, if you will. -Mary

Ruined Music BlackBerry haiku
by “Rasputin Jones”

Elton sings “Levon”
Jello shots, awkward grimace-
she just pooped herself.
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device

Seduced lesbian
with an Ani singalong
wait… this ain’t a chick.
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device

“My Sharona” blares
from the bright red Camaro
that just hit my dog.
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device

I wrote these all on the fly in bed w insomnia on my crackberry. How good is that
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device

u can publish haiku under moniker rize pealov unless u hate the name I also like rasputin jones I will do lots of them essay will be under real name
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device