To usher us into September, Cassettes Won’t Listen is releasing some tasty earhole treats: the “Freeze and Explode” single (featuring two new songs plus remixes by J Vegus and Maker) comes out on the 9th, along with a fresh-from-the-oven new video. In the meantime, CWL - aka Jason Drake - would like to have a word with you about ringtones, which will ruin your favorite song as fast as you can say “phone call from your ex.”

Okay. So I’m not going to lie and say I have never or will never buy a ringtone. The reason I hate ringtones is because I have bought so many in the past. Only recently have I realized that my previously-purchased ringtones are ruining my favorite songs.

When I first acquired a phone that could dial into the interweb and browse my phone carrier’s collection of tones, I realized my choices were pretty limited. Should I get Madonna’s “Ray of Light” or should I go for Limp Bizkit’s “Nookie”? Hmmm. Such difficult and potentially life-altering decisions. Actually, I didn’t want to be caught dead in public with any of those offerings blaring from my pocket, so I decided to wait it out and see if any songs I liked would show up at a later date. Unluckily, they did.

Soon I could choose between ringtones from Air, Portishead, A Tribe Called Quest, Royksopp, and others. I shelled out a grip of money so I could ‘express myself’ every time one of my friends called. I quickly found out that trying to express myself through a two-centimeter speaker muffled in my jeans pocket was not the right move. I also found out that each one of my favorite songs was becoming associated with phone calls. Whether it involved a friend, a family member or, worse, a telemarketer, every conversation began with a 15 second clip of my favorite song. That’s enough to turn your favorite song against you.

If you don’t believe me, try it out (I’m sure you all have by now). Find your mobile carrier’s ringtone store and download one of your favorite songs. You’ll enjoy it for the first couple weeks. Yeah, it’ll make you smile every time Mom calls and the Shins make you dance all the way to your phone. But believe me, that feeling of happy connection with your phone will soon dissipate and you’ll kick yourself in the ass, especially if you get a call you really don’t want to get. Goodbye favorite song of ‘08, hello wasted $2.50.

Oh, and you can buy Cassettes Won’t Listen ringtones right here.